"And Eye Hayulpped"

Now, most of you are going to figure that out and know PRECISELY to what the title refers. You get brownie points and an extra brownie from Annalena, as soon as she learns how to make them well. For now, you'll have to wait or settle for a cookie. For the rest of you: I believe the product is still available, something wretched called "Shake N Bake." During the 60s, and on through Buddha only knows when, there was a huge ad campaign for this stuff: it came in a box, a mix of powders, the identities of which took up so much space on the label one would think it was the Declaration of Independence. You would put chicken, or fish, or pork in a bag with it, shake it to coat, then put it on a baking sheet and bake. It was supposed to ensure that the meat or fish came out "moist and tender" and delicious.
One of the campaigns, the one that most people remember the most, had a southern family - mother and daughters (of course: this was the 60s , remember, and only women cooked....) bemoaning how their fried chicken just wasn't very good, so they tried shake and bake. The little girls got to put the stuff in the bag. That night, when dad came home and said "great fried chicken honey" the girls could smile and say "It ain't fried, it's shake and bake. And EYE HAYUPLED."
Oh dear. I will say that the product was a hit. I do recall a time, in my church going days (yes, Annalena was a church going woman once, but without a mantilla or anything like that), when I was on a not so religious retreat with a group of 70 men or so. (Yes, yes, yes. I know that, for some of you I just described saturday night. ). I was sharing kitchen duties with a friend who was making baked chicken for dinner. His grocery list included "40 boxes of shake and bake."
Shaking my head in sadness as I was trying to make fresh bread for 70, I shook it even harder when it turned out that his chicken was the hit of the dinner.
That was the early 80s, and whilst yours truly would like to think that our tastes have evolved, I remain skeptical.

Be this as it may, the idea of coating chicken and baking it to make a crispy crust, rather than deep frying it, is more than a bit appealing. Indeed, as my amazing trainer does her job, deep frying may be the next thing to go . I don't deep fry often, but I do do it. Never chicken though. My fried chicken is worse than my brownies.

So, a week and a half ago, I read a recipe in a spices catalogue for something very reminiscient of shake and bake. And I decided to give it a try. It's a hit. And it's open to tons of variation. I will give it to you here, modified from the source (of course), to make it a bit easier.

You of course need, chicken. You should start with 4 pounds. As a general rule, for chicken on the bone, you need a pound per person. A pound of bone in chicken does not produce all that much meat. If you have big eaters, get more. And when you are going to cook chicken parts, Annalena strongly suggests that you use either all legs, or all breasts. They cook differently, and if you try to mix them, one or the other will not be good. Trust me.

If at all possible, put the chicken into some kind of dairy, overnight. Buttermilk is ideal, you could also use yogurt, or milk. If you are going to use plain milk, "clabber" it by adding a tablespoon of vinegar to it before you put in the chicken. You should plan on a cup of dairy for every four pounds. If you can't marinate overnight, then put the chicken parts in the dairy while you prepare the rest of the stuff.

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees. W hile this is happening, get a big bag and combine flour and corn meal. How much? I used two cups of flour and a cup of corn meal for eight pounds of legs. Keep the 2:1 proportion. And don't change those components. The flour will stick to the chicken and carry the cornmeal, which gives the crunch. Then add your seasonings. Salt is a must: for every cup of flour mix, a teaspoon, please (so for the above, a tablespoon). Then whatever seasonings you like: spicy seasonings if you like spicy, etc. Measure spicy stuff by teaspoons. I did use a big tablespoon of Italian seasonings, and some cayenne pepper, and that was it. I bet curry would be good. The thing you MUST use is a quarter cup of grated parmesan cheese, for every four pounds of chicken. Just mix it in with the powder.

OK, after, or while you're doing that, take a half stick of butter for every four pounds of chicken, put it on a baking sheet, and let it melt in the preheated oven. It won't take long, and don't go away. When it's melted, carefully take the tray out, and then get to work on your chicken. Your hands are going to get messy. Pull each piece out of the dairy and put it in the bag... and shake to coat. (don't do more than one piece at a time and as you need to clean your hands, go ahead). Put each piece on the butter laden tray. When you're done, turn the pieces to cover them in butter. Don't worry if it's not too coated. Then, make sure all of the chicken is skin side up, and put the tray in the oven. If you're baking breasts, after 25 minutes, turn them so the skin is down. If legs, don't worry about it. Bake for a total of about 50 minutes for chicken breasts, an hour for the legs.

If you peak while this is cooking, you will wonder if you're doing it right. After fifteen minutes, it looks like a mess. After thirty minutes , however, it takes on some color and the smell of chicken begins to mingle in the air. And after 50, you have chicken that is browned unevenly, so that you have some crispy bits, some browned bits, some burned bits, all the things you like. And I guarantee you that the people you serve will like it too.

So make up a big mess of it. Maybe even get someone to hayulp you.