Putting yourself in a pickle: a pineapple one

Who knows what inspired Annalena to make this?  Perhaps, the recent death of Annette Funicello, who had a hit song when Annalena was a ragazzo, called "Pineapple Princess."  Or, perhaps the recognition that she did not make her pineapple sorbet this year, and as local fruit season is about to begin, she probably won't.  There are so many variables, that trying to do this kind of, "discordant analysis," will only lead you to a dead end.

Anyway, a few posts ago, Annalena asked what people wanted to see next.  She got one comment, under "anonymous," but she is pretty sure it is her friend Bobby, or perhaps his friend Iris, who wrote the note.  And so here it is.

Let us start with something that everyone needs to understand, especially if you like pickles:  YOU DO NOT HAVE TO START CANNING AND PRESERVING THINGS TO LAST UNTIL THE NEXT MILLENNIUM.  In fact, you don't even have to can and preserve until you can SPELL millennium.  Most pickles are, and were, made for consumption fairly quickly.  And that is why we make small batches, and even with small batches,  we give them to people we love or like.  Because everyone likes pickles.  Even people who say they don't.  People who don't like "pickles," usually don't like cucumbers.  You can pickle anything.  Ananlena thinks she has.  Well, maybe not, because until now, she hadn't pickled pinapple. She likes this.  It's easy.  You can do it.  So can you Bobby.  Just be ready, as Annalena said, to go to your spice market, or to visit a friend, like Annalena, who has the spices and will share them.

Here's yourlist.  It's substantial.  You need a star anise (you should have them around anyway.  They're pretty).  Seriously, ragazzi, just one. They are strong.  You need a small cinnamon stick. Do not cheat and use powder.  You need a clove.  Yes, A clove.  Annalena could taste it in her pickles, so don't leave it out.  A tablespoon EACH of fennel seed, coriander seed, mustard seed. All whole seeds again, ragazzi.   T teaspoon of chili flakes, any level of hotness, but be warned: there are hot elements ahead.  You need 3 or 4 sprigs of thyme.  If you choose to use lemon thyme, Annalena will not put up the stop sign.  Put this all in pot.  Add to it a quart of vinegar.  Annalena used a combination of apple cider, and red.  You might want to stick to all apple cider, or apple cider and white, because the red gives the brine a darker color.  Your choice.    Now add six cups of water.    Bring it to a boil, and when it boils, lower it to a simmer, for fifteen minutes.

While that's going on, dispatch a large pineapple, and here, underripe pineapple will do just fine.  Trim off the skin and top. You can get illustrations of this on line if you don't know how, and cut it into bite sized pieces.  Put these in a non reactive bowl (glass, ceramic, etc), and make sure it's large.

We come to the heat element now:  a half habanero pepper, chopped, and a jalapeno pepper chopped.  This is going to be spicy, so if it sounds too spicy for you, cut it back.  You can also toss in a few sprigs of mint, if you have it.  Mint is a good compliment to pineapple.

When your brine has simmered for fifteen minutes, put a strainer over the pineapple, and then pour it all through the strainer.  Make sure the strainer holes are small enough to retain the seeds.  If you don't have one of the proper gauge, line what you have with cheesecloth, or a towel.  

Cover this, and let it sit for a couple of hours, until it cools.  Now, scoop out the pineapple, and put it into jars or a large container, or whatever.  You will only retain enough liquid to cover the fruit.  The rest?  Well... bye bye.    It was nice knowing you.

Store this in the fridge, where it keeps for several weeks.  Bring it out when you're serving a rich dish, like pork or duck.  Something where you think  "Oh... X and pineapple sounds good."  And you know what? Putting this on the plate with the meat, transforms you from  a "cook," to a "chef," as everyone marvels at how clever you are.

Only we will know. Only us...


We return to pineapple tomorrow, in a somewhat problematic dish of prawns, pineapple, and mint.