COOKIES

Let's take a little break and turn to a topic which is a bit controversial to me.

"Controversial" is maybe not the right word here. First, let me let you in on a little secret: I HATE making cookies. They take up a ton of time, you can't "multitask" when you're making them, because they bake so quickly, and nothing disappears as quickly as a plate of homemade cookies. On the other hand, when you're eating ice cream, or a simple dish of fruit, nothing goes along as well as a cookie. And by cookie, I don't mean biscotti, which are wonderful in their own right. No, I'm talking about good ole American cookies, loaded with sugar, fat and goodies. The kind where you can't help yourself and eat too many of them, feel guilty about it, but go back for "just one more."

If ONE person yells "MALLOMARS" I am going to scream. Very, very LOUD.

When I make American cookies, I almost always make gingersnaps. That's because I like them, and while everyone says that "Oh, I LOVE chocolate," put a pile of gingersnaps out, next to chocolate chip cookies, and watch what goes first. It's interesting. (And I'll be posting chocolate chip and gingersnap cookie recipes in the next couple of days). You think that something is your "favorite," and then something pops up that makes you reconsider.

Sort of like love, isn't it? OOPS. I shouldn't have said that. But it IS true in some ways. Ok, maybe not like love, maybe like lust. Nothing wrong with that.

So anyway, what I'm posting today is sort of a transitional recipe, from those wonderful Italian biscotti to American cookies. Now, I warn you, this recipe is complex. It takes a while to make, and it takes some work. But once you get the hang of it, these are wonderful, wonderful cookies, and you will impress yourself and a lot of people with these.

The recipe is one from the crew of great San Francisco cooks: Joanne Weir. I used to make time in my schedule to watch her show when it was carried in NYC. Now, it's not, and I'm tempted to move somewhere just so I can watch her big smile, her easy manner, and her encouraging "You can do it" attitude toward cooking. She never made these on tv, which is a shame. Make them.

Some hints for success here. First, this makes a LOT of cookies. You'll need to use both racks of your oven to bake them, or you'll feel like the Prisoner of Zenda by the time you're done. Every oven has a hot spot. Normally, what you would do with cookies is you would rotate them halfway through the baking process to avoid burning some cookies and underbaking others. You should do that here, but this is a LONG bake, because the cookies are based on meringue. But what you should ALSO do is plan on using a doubled baking sheets. This will keep the cookies from burning.

Ok, equipment established, this is what you need. First, two cups of hazelnuts. Taste them if you can, because hazelnuts go rancid really fast AND YOU WILL KNOW. If they're fresh, don't worry about the skins. They taste good. Put these on a sheet, and roast them at 350 for about ten minutes. Pour the nuts into a bowl and let them cool. You can do this well before you make the cookies. You will also need the whites of three eggs, and a tablespoon of white vinegar mixed with these eggwhites (a trick that Joanne taught and it works every time. The vinegar helps the eggwhites peak really well). You also add 1/4 teaspoon of salt to these whites. Keep a cup of sugar nearby, and also, a real v anilla bean, sliced in half,horizontally.

I told you, this was complex.

You also need four ounces EACH of semisweet and bittersweet chocolate. I agree with Joanne and use Scharffenberger, but if you prefer another type, use it. Go at these chocolates with a serrated knife, and chop them finely, but don't worry about making the shards uniform. It makes a more interesting cookie if they are not.

After you've chopped the chocolate, chop the nuts. Know the easiest way to do it? Nope, not the food processor. Put the nuts in a plastic bag, a nice strong one, and then put that in a second bag. Go at them with a heavy duty rolling pin, the bottom of a skillet, anything that is nice and heavy. Again, don't try for precision chopping here. These are homemade cookies.

Tired yet? Better not be. Now start beating the mix of the eggwhites vinegar and salt. You'll eventually get to a nice, soft peak, that looks like those custard ice cream cones the way the tip drips over. When you get there, start adding your cup of sugar, in small increments and keep mixing. Then add the vanilla bean innards (all those little seeds). You'll wind up with a meringue that stands up nice and proud, like a rooster's comb (that's for my friend Huck, by the way). Stop mixing and fold in the chocolate, and the nuts.

Ok, NOW we start baking. TUrn the oven to 250. Yup, 250. I use a melon baller, but you can use any spoon size you like and put the cookies down on a parchment lined doubled tray. You're going for about 24 to a sheet. I like to make them smaller rather than bigger. Get them in the oven, and after tweny minutes, reverse the pans and also move the top tray to the bottom, and vice versa. Keep an eye on them. You want a nice, pale brown/tan color, nothing too dark. If they're darkening too much, take them out.

You MUST let these cool completely. If you don't, you'll never get them off the parchment. But when they're cool, you can store them forever, if they last that long.

When I had a different kitchen name, I called these cookies "Lena's love drops," and I would frequently make them for my lady friends who were not all that adept at making cookies, as a seduction aid with their men. I heard nothing but good things about them, so maybe they work?